How many weblogs have I had now? Too many to count. And for too many purposes to count, too.
I won't go over past details too much. I want to focus on the present. And right now, I'm feeling bored and slightly lonely. Lonely isn't the right word for it, though. Isolated would be better. Or even anti-social, though maybe not that one in the strictest sense. I haven't been going out as much as I'd like to. I attribute this to the fact that I'm not in school yet and I have no real pressing, urgent goals to meet. During times like this, especially summer, god do I hate summer, I tend to become very sedentary.
I would like to see my friends more regularly. Right now, the only time I really speak to people is at the infusion center, and even then that's very limited. I'm not sure starting school will help much, since I transfered to Mission College. At least at De Anza I knew a few folks that could keep good company. This quarter will be one of loneliness and apprehension, I fear.
I'll be leaving for New Mexico in the fall, if all goes as planned. I don't know how I feel about this. It's very complicated in my head, but written out it seems as clear as day. Why shouldn't I go? Because I would prefer UC Santa Cruz. But if I'm not willing to do what it takes to get there, what choice do I have? It's very depressing to think about moving again, just when I'm getting accustomed to the bay area. Just when I'm starting to create a life here.
New Mexico is a new adventure. I'm just not sure I'm ready for one yet.
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